Sunday, December 29, 1996
THE NOTHING PHILOSOPHY
Since in Eastern Europe the word "liberal" still has its original, positive meaning (open-minded, tolerant of others), this writer tried to explain to some Serbian demonstration leaders why the above epithet about the alleged nihilism would actually be considered a COMPLIMENT in the liberal New World Order speak. The more faceless, drab, materialistic, corruptable... a person is, the better he/she is suited for a LEADERSHIP position within the globalist-style world order.
By contrast, letis see how such a liberal nihilistic ideology might play with the Belgrade pro-democracy demonstrators. Here's a mock "news report" about a fictitious speech by a fictitious Serbian opposition leader. Let's call him - Levi Desnic (a 'Lefty Rightwing' in loose translation).
Levi Desnic steps toward the microphone to address a crowd of several tens of thousands of Belgrade protesters. He pauses, he thumps himself on the chest and proudly declares: 'I BELIEVE IN NOTHING!' He pauses again.
The crowd seems stunned. Some demonstrators can be seen pointing their index fingers to their heads, as people do when wondering if a person had gone mad.
'And because I believe in nothing,' Levi Desnic continues, 'I am the most qualified politician to be the next President of Serbia.'
The crowd starts chuckling, evidently assuming Levi Desnic is building up to a joke.
'Why must Serbia have a President who believes in nothing?,' Levi Desnic asks rhetorically. 'Because Serbia needs the support of the international community if it is to rejoin the community of nations. And everybody in the international community knows that only people who believe in nothing can lead it.'
Now the crowd is roaring with laughter.
'Levi-Nothing,' 'Levi-Nothing,' some are chanting spontaneously, as if it were a sporting eventis shutout score.
Realizing the crowd took his remarks as a joke, Levi Desnic rushes to offer a proof of his theory: 'So you think believing in nothing is a joke? Well then, let me offer you some proof to the contrary. Do you believe that Helmut Kohl, for example, believes in nothing?'
'Daaa,' the crowd replies, albeit after some hesitation. 'Maybe Kohl believes in a bratwurst,' one participant can be overheard as muttering. 'But what the heck; the man's gotta eat.'
'Do you think that Bill Clinton believes in nothing?' Levi Desnic continues to test the demonstrators, as if lecturing at a university auditorium.
'Daaaaa,' the Belgrade crowd roars back.
'Do you think that Boris Yeltsin believes in nothing?'
'Daaaaaaaaa,' the crowd responds louder and longer.
'Do you think that Madelaine Albright believes in nothing?'
'Daaaaaaaaaaaaa,' the crowd shouts back its longest and loudest approval.
'And aren't all these people respected leaders of the international community?' Levi Desnic uses Logic 101 to set up the victory line.
'Daaa,' some in the crowd reply. Others are seen shaking their heads, as if realizing that maybe this was not a Levi Desnic comedy hour.
'Therefore,' Levi Desnic delivers his punch line, 'when I tell you that I believe in nothing, that means that I am the only political leader in Serbia on a par with all these world leaders. Even Milosevic believes in something... He believes in socialism. He believes in corruption. He believes in his wife. He believes in his police. Who knows, maybe he even believes in his sonis winning an Indy 500 race...'
A loud laughter forces Levi Desnic to pause. After everybody settles down, he continues.
'By contrast, I can assure you that I believe in nothing. Nothing, do you hear?' he shouts for added effect. 'I don't believe in God; I don't believe in life after death; I don't believe in holy matrimony; I don't believe in democracy; I donit believe in autocracy; I don't believe in military; I donit believe in eflower children," I don't believe in Santa Claus... I tell, you - I believe in nothing!
He pauses to allow the stirring crowd to settle down.
'Which is why I am the most qualified politician to be the next President of Serbia! Don't you agree?'
'Levi-Nothing,' 'Levi-Nothing,' some start to chant.
'Kohlbright-Nothing,' 'Kohlbright-Nothing...', other pick up the refrain.
'Nothing-Nothing,' 'Nothing-Nothing...' (the ultimate 'liberal nirvana' ...)
As the Belgrade crowd disperses for the night, after voting for democracy with its feet for 29 straight days, the exuberant Serbian opposition party officials gather around their leader to congratulate him on his speech. 'My, Levi, you really had them going...' one of them says, patting Desnic on his back. 'But surely, you must believe in something?'
'I believe in the same thing Clinton believes in,' Levi Desnic replies.
'Oh, yeah? And whatis that?'
'The Almighty Dollar.'
'The Almighty Dollar?'
'Or a Deutsch Mark... Or a Yen... We are not that particular. We'll take anything Wall Street gives us. It's the money that makes the world go around, man! Crosses, crescents, flags, anthems... these are all archaic symbols for the backward masses. In our New World, we'll do away with all of them.'
'The masses or the symbols?'
Attribution: Djurdjevic is a Phoenix, Arizona-based writer and businessman. He writes about geopolitical and economic issues.
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